23 Weeks, 3 Days

Our doctor's appointment went well today. JD's heart sounded good and Dave got to meet Dr. Nelson. Our next appointment isn't until March 25, 2008. As long as I feel him move pretty consistently there's no need for me to go in more often. We also have a follow-up ultrasound scheduled for April 3, 2008. All in all, it was pretty uneventful which is just the way I like it!

22 Weeks, 1 Day

I saw Dr. Markley again this morning. She basically wanted to discuss our visit to MUSC and check on me and John David. His heart sounded strong this morning and she tells me that I will be visiting her office every week from now on to monitor him. She also said that if I needed to hear his heart in between visits to just call and they would let me listen.....

I talked with her some more about Ashlyn. She said that they would do some tests on her as well as on her cord and placenta when she is delivered (when JD is born) but that about 80% of these cases remain a mystery.

My next doctor visit is on February 28, 2008.

MUSC - 22 Weeks

Dave and I got up super early and drove to Charleston in the rain this morning.

We arrived a full hour early for our appointment (we were a little anxious) but they saw us right away anyway. Seeing Ashlyn on the screen was hard but I only cried a little bit. Luckily, they only needed to get a few photos of her for documentation and then moved on to looking at JD.

Just like last time, he was squirming around non-stop. They looked closely at his heart and said it looks great. His heart rate is 150 bpm which is right on target. They measured his head, arm bones, leg bones and belly (they said he has a big belly) and estimated his current weight to be 1 pound, 1 ounce.

The doctor came in after the ultrasound to talk to us. He didn't give us any reason for Ashlyn not making it. He said it could be a cord problem, a placenta problem, etc. In other words it could have been any number of things and there's no way to tell for sure. He said as JD gets bigger, Ashlyn's little body will become "compressed" against the uterine wall and will probably not even resemble a baby when JD is born and she is delivered too. It's sad to think that my little girl is getting "compressed" but there's nothing I can do about it so I'll just try to focus on the fact that JD is healthy and growing like he should be. The doctor did tell me that this will be more like a singleton pregnancy from now on in that many of the risks associated with twins (preterm labor, etc) have now been removed. There is no longer any need for us to go to Charleston for our ultrasounds unless there is a problem. I think I'll insist on an ultrasound at my doctor's office at least once a month from now on. I hate to be that paranoid pregnant woman that drives everybody crazy but we had no warnings or indications that Ashlyn's heart would stop beating... I don't think I could handle the same thing happening to JD.

On a lighter note, here are JD's latest pictures....

JD's profile

4-D Profile... Look at his cute little ear!

4-D of his face....

In case there was any question.... it's definitely a boy!

Devastated....

It absolutely breaks my heart to have to type this entry.

I went to the doctor yesterday as a follow up to my swollen ankles. I met with the Nurse Practictioner and she couldn't locate both heartbeats. She asked me to stay for an ultrasound to see how they were laying. Dave was not with me.....

I lay on the ultrasound table with gel all over my belly and the u/s tech said she needs someone to come look with her...that's when I started to worry. She comes back with Dr. Markley and the Nurse Practictioner. They show me JD and his heart was just fluttering away. When she moves to Ashlyn she points out the low level of amniotic fluid and then focuses on her chest. I could see her tiny heart... not moving. My poor baby girl's heart stopped beating sometime within the last week and we just don't know why.

Dave came and picked me up from the doctor's office and took me home. I've been waiting by the phone ever since waiting for MUSC to call and tell me when to come down. Dr. Markley said they should want to see me sometime today or Monday to be sure JD is going to pull through this okay (sometimes the loss of a twin can trigger pre-term labor) but also to see if they can't figure out why our baby girl didn't make it.

The doctors said JD has a very good chance of pulling through this and being carried full term because he has a separate placenta... I just have to stay strong because the stress is not good for him. Dave has been an absolute pillar of strength. I know he is hurting at the loss of our daughter just as much as I am but he's doing a wonderful job of calming me down.... even when I wake up at 1:30 in the morning.

NAMES!!!

While in St. Thomas Dave and I had plenty of time to discuss names. It wasn't easy but we finally agreed on both a boy name and a girl name.

Boy: John David (will go by either John David or JD)
Girl: Ashlyn Terese (will go by Ashlyn)

I'm so excited that we can stop calling them "the boy" and "the girl"

20 weeks!

Officially half way there! Actually, since full term for twins is 37 weeks (not 40 like in a normal pregnancy) I'm more than half way! I hit the 20 week mark (or 5 month mark) while Dave and I were in St. Thomas (I'll post a long entry on that later). Strangers are now asking when I'm due so I thought it would be a good time to post a belly pic. Dave says it grows every day!

I had a doctor's appointment today. Both heartbeats were good, although every time she found the boy's heart beat he would move and she ended up having to chase him around. I've now gained a total of 19 pounds which the doctor says is right on track... The only new development are the swollen feet and ankles. They started swelling at 19 weeks and today they were HUGE! She said it's kind of early for so much swelling so I have to go back in a week so she can check on them. She sent me away with orders to elevate them as much as possible, stay away from sodium, drink lots and lots of water and wear support stockings. Hopefully these things will help. It's not painfull but it's not pretty either!